Yesterday was PulseFM Party In The Park, an open air event held at Myrtle Park in Bingley. I don’t normally do these type of events because I tend to stick out like a sore thumb theses days amongst all the young pop acts who perform at them. However, since Pulse is the local radio station of Bradford, the city in which I was born and brought up, and they’ve shown some support for my new record I thought why not for once.

We arrived at the venue about midday because I was originally scheduled to appear at about 1.30pm. Everything was well organised, much better than in the past when we used to do these sort of events ten years ago or more. It had been raining on and off all morning, so when we arrived we were escorted to our designated portacabin under a large umbrella. Unfortunately there had been a cancellation by one of the acts and things were running a bit late because they had had to reschedule the running order. We settled down in our cabin, sparsely fitted out with a couple of plastic chairs, a table and a mirror to wait for our rescheduled time. After signing some pictures and bits and pieces left by the organisers we were struggling to find anything else to occupy ourselves. We briefly chatted with the guys in the portacabin next door, had a pop at a few record companies, drank some tea and made several trips to the portable toilets to fill in time. There was a hospitality tent but we weren’t really hungry and didn’t fancy a drink so we didn’t bother with that.

Each act was only performing a few songs so we ticked them off the list as they appeared one after the other until it was nearing our turn. We were sandwiched in between Sandi Thom and McFly. Whilst Sandi Thom was finishing her performance we were standing by the side of the stage and I had a real blast from the past. An old friend from many years ago approached me. At first I was a little confused because I was focused on going on stage but then I realised it was Gerrard, the guitarist in an old band called ‘Dignity’ in which I was one of the backing singers 20 plus years ago. On this occasion he was the guy responsible for the whole sound set up for the event but back then he was one of the members of the band who eventually voted for me to be sacked, I suspect because I wasn’t enough of a dolly bird. Typical I recall that I wasn’t very happy about it at the time but there’s been a lot of water under the bridge since then and I can hardly hold a grudge when in retrospect he probably did me a big favour. There wasn’t much time to talk as I was about to go on so we agreed to have a chat afterwards.

Once onstage, I suddenly remembered why I stopped doing these events. The crowd was quite large, I’d guess at somewhere about 5,000 but jammed together at the front were hundreds of soaking wet, very young girls desperate for me to clear off and let their idols McFly strut their stuff. I soldiered on regardless and finished the scheduled three songs. I felt appreciated by some of the older members of the audience a bit further back but I’m sure the pubescent throng at the front were only cheering because I was finishing Well, we were all young once.

We met Gerrard again and walked back to the portacabin where we took some pictures and had a chat about old times and what he was up to now. I’ll post up the pictures if I get copies sent. I still had a live radio interview to do so we hung around a bit more until it was time to be called for that.

The two djs who talked to me were very perky and seemed interested in what I had to say. We talked about the usual things like where I’d been etc etc but oddly they also asked me my opinion about programmes like the x factor and pop idol. Well, I don’t watch them if I can avoid them but I have seen enough to have a bit of an opinion. I can’t hold any grudges against the competitors who go on them, after all they’re just desperate to try and break into a business that’s very tough to crack. If they’d been around when I was younger, and not knowing what I know now, I’d probably have been misguided enough into auditioning for them myself. I know that they are very popular programmes and they seem to be accepted without question by the competitors and the wider audience but I can’t help but feel that they are exploitive. The record companies must be rubbing their hands with glee as they pick up these kids on crap contracts that in no way reflect the fact that they don’t have to put any time or money into building up their profiles because they’re already well known. They make a few cheap recordings with them, make a quick buck, then kick them into touch when they grow up and want to develop. One of the djs commented to me about an artist who had been performing the same day and how he had been speaking to them earlier about his experiences after appearing on one of these programmes. He’d commented on how he was struggling to shake off the impression people have of him. This artist spoke of being ‘type cast’ nowadays and how changing peoples perception of what he was really about was impossible. He was finding it hard to be taken seriously. Well I could have predicted that before he even entered for an audition.

It got me thinking about how my own experience with a major record company and the media is not really that much different. Although I got into a record deal by a different route and write my own material I was quickly pigeon-holed after the success of my first album and encountered enormous resistence from the label and the media when I attempted to develop as an artist with ‘Bloom’. It was apparant after we’d finished recording ‘Bloom’ and prior to its release that I was at a crossroads. Faced with the choice of conforming to the stereotype that I’d been anointed with or digging my heels in and suffering the consequences of no support for the release I chose the latter. I have no regrets but I’m certain the whole experience with the rows I had with EMI about ‘Bloom’ was the cause of my block and subsequent delay in making another record. Don’t get me wrong, my first album was pretty much how we wanted it to be and I wouldn’t change it but I didn’t want to make part two of it for my second. Okay, we artists have to accept that business is business and major labels have no interest in what they put out as long as it sells. I only wish that they’d be a bit more honest about it upfront and not try to pretend otherwise that they give a shit about your art.

Anyway I’m getting off the track a bit now and I can see I’m heading for a rant so I’ll stop and say thanks to Pulse FM for having me on your show.